Allgemein, Poetry

Not All Prayers Are Answered

You plead,
You bleed,
You scream,
You yell,
You tell.

Your story,
Your worry,
Your fears,
Your tears,
For years.

You hope,
You dream,
You wish,
You feel,
You reel!

You command,
You demand,
You rage,
You age.
You weep,
You sleep.

You wail,
You’re frail.
You cry,
Ask why?

Their reply:
Not all prayers are answered.
That’s why,
Some die.

© Virginia Stone

Allgemein, Poetry

Death and Despair

Girl:
Please sweet death come down on me!
Touch me with your black wings
And set my fire free!
Take me to the depths of hell,
Take me to heaven,
I don’t care,
It’s all the same,
It’s all well!


Death:
Why do you call for me?
Why should I end your life?
Is there any reason for me?
Is there even a reason for thee?

Girl:
Oh please sweet death,
Embrace me with black fire,
Take me to another place up higher!
There’s no reason for me to live on,
It went all so wrong!

Death:
You little child,
Don’t demand such things from me,
I won’t do you this favour.
It’s not your time to go with me!

Girl:
But please my dear friend,
It should,
No it must end!
Take me with you on the eternal flight,
Give me the kiss,
It is my right!

Death:
You are too young to understand,
The meaning of life and death,
My friend!
I can’t kill people as I please,
I’m not doing this with ease!

Girl:
You have to help me
Or I’ll gamble my soul!

Death:
Young girl,
Don’t make me lose control!
Others plead for their lives,
Stabbed by knifes
Or some shot between the eyes!
Why do you want to die?
Tell me little girl,
Why do you want to make others cry?

Girl:
I don’t have any reason to live,
My life is so hollow,
I want to follow,
LET ME SWALLOW THE PILL,
I know I will…
Go to the place without fear,
Go to the place of my dear!

Death:
Oh what a fool you are,
It was his fate to die in the car!
And it is your destiny to live on,
Even if it all seems wrong.
I understand your pain,
But all attempts are in vain!
Go and live your life on full expense,
Before it ends!

Girl:
It sounds so easy but it isn’t true,
You don’t have human feelings,
You know nothing about what
I had to go through!

Death:
You may be right,
But I won’t take you
On my flight!

Girl:
Angel of darkness why are you so cruel?
Even though you rule,
About life and death.
It’s you who’s got the power
In the
aftermath!

Death:
I’m dealing with the gift of power.
It’s me who says when it is your last hour!
What’s so bad about life anyway?

Girl:
It’s the fact that he couldn’t stay!
It’s the fact of standing up every day,
The fact that I’m breathing whereas he’s away!
It are all those feelings that make me sway!
How can I live while he’s dead?
How can I be happy without going mad?
How can I be glad…?
To live…
I’M LIVING AND HE IS DEAD!!!

Death:
Young poor girl,
There’s still so much you have to learn.
Yearn for him when you feel like it,
Cry all night to get rid of this hit.
Take your time to mourn,
Take your time,
It is no crime.
But there’s one thing,
I have to tell,
Something he told me,
Before his body fell.

He loved you with every fibre of his heart.
He loved the girl you were,
Oh you’ve been so smart!
There was only one wish he had,
Before he flew towards the moon,
Gazing directly into my empty head.

He wanted you to be strong,
He told me that you have to keep on.
He knew there was nothing he could give,
Except of the gift that you’d live.
He wanted you to have a better life,

He simply wanted you,
To stay alive…

© Virginia Stone

Allgemein, P - T, Reviews, T

Review: They Both Die at the End (Adam Silvera)

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Rating: 4 Pfoten

”Mateo, I regret to inform you that sometime in the next twenty-four hours you’ll be meeting an untimely death. And while there isn’t anything we can do to suspend that, you still have a chance to live.”

Imagine a stranger calls you in the middle of the night and tells you those exact words. Did you end up in a horror movie? Nope. You’re in the future and by now technology is so advanced that people are informed when they are going to die. But of course there’s a catch. They inform you 24 hours before you die and they neither know how it’s going to happen nor when. A car crash, an elevator, an explosion, choking on food? In three hours, right now when you receive the call, 23 hours and 59 minutes from the moment you’ve been called? Everything is possible.

”I was raised to be honest, but the truth can be complicated. It doesn’t matter if the truth won’t make a mess, sometimes the words don’t come out until you’re alone. Even that’s not guaranteed. Sometimes the truth is a secret you’re keeping from yourself because living a lie is easier.”

So what are you supposed to do? Try to fight it? Stay at home and hope you’re safe there? Go out and live your last day to the fullest? Deny it or rather use the chance to say goodbye to your loved ones? It’s up to you but whatever you do, “Death Cast” is never wrong and sooner or later death will find and claim you. It doesn’t matter if you’re 90 or 5. A mother, father, child, husband, aunt, best friend or a celebrity, death doesn’t care about those things, it makes no difference.

”I look ahead at the empty streets, and I start walking towards Rufus and his bike, walking towards death with every minute we lose, walking against a world that’s against us.”

Mateo and Rufus both received the call and neither of them is able to say goodbye to their loved ones. Rufus made a mistake that caused his friends to be “unavailable” and Mateo’s father is in a coma and won’t even notice when his son dies. Thankfully there’s an app for situations like that (I just loved this! I mean nowadays there’s an app for everything, right? *lol*) and our two boys meet over “Last Friend”. They are both going to die and they decide to spend their last day together…

”You shouldn’t donate to charity, help the elderly cross the street, or rescue puppies in the hopes you’ll be repaid later. I may not be able to cure cancer or end world hunger, but small kindnesses go a long way.”

And here is the moment when I’m finally going to talk about those two young and sweet boys that only have one day left to do whatever they feel like doing. This book really made me think and it certainly caused me to feel. I could relate to their struggle so much and a little part of me broke when Mateo threw his books across the room knowing full well that it wouldn’t matter if they got ripped or destroyed because in a few hours he wouldn’t be there to care about it. There were so many little moments that ripped my heart out. T_T Mateo singing for his dad who couldn’t hear him, Rufus hoping the Plutos would show up, Mateo taking care of his best friend’s kid so she could have a few moments to herself, Rufus thinking that Mateo is pure… IT. BROKE. MY. FREAKING. HEART!

”Entire lives aren’t lessons, but there are lessons in lives.
You may be born into a family, but you walk into friendships. Some you’ll discover you should put behind you. Others are worth every risk.”

What Mateo and Rufus have at the end of their lives is so special! They get to know each other in a way not many people are able to. They speak about the important things, they don’t shy away from difficult topics and they get involved with each other. Without prejudices, without a second thought! But would they have been so open if it wouldn’t have been their last day? I doubt it. There are things you’re too scared to say, things you don’t even dare to think about, but what if the only person that’s holding you back is actually yourself?

I lean in to his ear. “I want to go to Jones Beach and race you to the waves and play in the rain with our friends. But I want quiet nights, too, where we talk about nonsense while watching bad movies.” I want us to have history, something longer than the small window of time we’re actually sharing, with an even longer future, but the dying elephant in the room crushes me.”

I loved that Rufus helped Mateo to find himself and I adored the way Mateo was able to get under Rufus’s skin. What if they would have been given more time together? How much they could have achieved and done; how good they could have lived! It’s just so unfair! Or at least it seems to be like that because if there is one thing you can say about death, then it’s that it’s actually fair. It makes no difference between young or old, married or single, famous or not, good or bad, sick or healthy, queer or straight, happy or unhappy. It’s just death and it … well, it happens. Sooner or later we all have to go. We’re born and we die, whatever happens in the middle is up to us.

”Why can’t we knock on Death’s door and be or barter or arm-wrestle or have a staring contest for the chance to keep living? I’d even want to fight for the chance to decide how I die. I’d go in my sleep.”

4

I guess you can already tell that this book made me think really hard. To be honest I never stopped thinking about it and I’m pretty sure this is one of those books that will stay with me for quite a while. Adam Silvera painted a vivid picture of a world in which we all know when it’s time to go. Whether this is good or bad is up for discussion and we readers are encouraged to give it some serious thought. The different POVs only add to that thought process and the way all those lives are connected and interwoven gives the reader a profound sense of life and its scope as well as its associated mechanisms. Or in other words: It’s like with the figuratively pebble that’s thrown in the pond. An infinitesimal action has huge consequences.

I won’t tell you how this ends because you know, “They Both Die at the End” or not?? but I will admit that close to the ending my thoughts were all over the place and I found myself yelling: “Oh, sh**! It can’t be!!!”

spoiler

It’s not the “when” or “what” that will leave your mind reeling, it’s the HOW!!!! AASDFKLASDJFKSDFJASKLDFJSAKLDFJSLD!!!

All told this was a great book that no doubt, will leave its mark.

”There are questions I can’t answer. I cannot tell you how you will survive without me. I cannot tell you how to mourn me. I cannot convince you to not feel guilty if you forget the anniversary of my death, or if you realize days or weeks or months have gone by without thinking about me.
I just want you to live.”

Allgemein, Poetry

Cold Breath

Your iron will,
Your mighty power,
It’s all gone
Within an hour.

What’s left is just an empty shell,
Enough to feel,
Enough to experience living hell.

Haze is spreading in your eyes
They are no longer able to disguise
The fear that’s creeping in your spine,
Death that whispers you’ll be mine.

So many years your might was uncontested,
You’ve never been tested.

This change it happened so fast.
But you,
You fought until at last.

So many things we could not say
Until your soul
it went astray.

 

© Virginia Stone